Whiplash

I was up till 2am watching what is happening in Ferguson… again. I am entirely overwhelmed by the enormity of what is happening in my country. Then I went to get a waffle this morning because I was starving while the kids were asleep and I had a chatty conversation with a woman about baby carriers and their various functionalities. She asked me about my travel plans then proceeded to tell me at great length that she would never abandon her husband.

Between Michfest, police officers killing black citizens, and white women feeling the need to tell me constantly that I’m abandoning my husband by traveling… I feel like my life is fucking surreal. I feel like I can’t begin to say what I feel about any given topic because there are so many topics going on.

I am really tired. Today is going to be festive. We are supposed to visit with a friend from California who is in this area visiting family. I’m supposed to be all upbeat and cheerful and shit because that’s polite.

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

We have to make it to Pittsburgh by the 12th so we can pick Noah up. Today and the next two days are driving days because we have to cover over 600 miles. Noah wants to go to a birthday party that is happening in Pittsburgh and that is why he is coming out this time. It was just luck that we are in Pittsburgh when he wants to be there.

Not sure if I will be able to be coherent this morning. I’m all over the place. I worry that I will need caffeine later.

The kids were up until 11 and 12, respectively. WHY COULDN’T YOU DO THAT AT MICHFEST INSTEAD OF WANTING TO BE IN BED AT 9?! I really wanted to go to the shows and the kids just couldn’t do it. Maybe it is because at Michfest we had to walk 3-9 miles a day. (3 miles roundtrip from our campsite to the main festival area. We camped too bloody far away. I didn’t realize we were in the very farthest spot from everything when we set up. Whoops.)

Youngest child is the one who made it to midnight. I blame the damn nap in the car.

The friend we see today has a kid in the same age range as my kids. They like playing together a lot so this should be fun. Tomorrow we are going to stop and see another fellow I met in the bay area who has since moved full time to Michigan. The next day we get to Pittsburgh to camp in the driveway of one of Noah’s college friends–they unschool their two kids who are barely older than my kids.

Lots going on. A lot of things to think about and remember and rehearse in my head. How to be polite. How to be accommodating. Don’t walk around screaming, “Fuck the police” all the time or it may be problematic.

But you know what? Fuck the police.

I got 15 ant bites in my last hour of striking camp. I don’t god damn know why. I think they were even falling out of the tree because they were landing on my back and biting me really high up–not just my feet. By the last one I was screaming and freaking out because it hurt and then I felt really guilty because I freaked out some neighbors. I’m sorry. That is a lot of bites in a short period.

I didn’t get bit at all by ants any other day.

Between the ants, mosquitos, and lesbians it feels like half of Michigan wanted to eat me. (I thought that line was funny. I didn’t actually get directly hit on at all by any lesbians. They were friendly and not flirtatious.)

Ok, kids are up. Breakfast is had. Must get moving.

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