It’s bound to happen to trainwrecks like me.

I was snarked on a troll site. I was dumb enough to read the thread. I’m an abusive monster says the all knowing internet.

I’m really sad now. It feels like quite an interesting change from the rock star feeling I’ve been having as I nail interaction after interaction of integrating new people and routines and complications.

It doesn’t really matter. The worst things you have ever done are all you are.

And I already knew I was a monster. I knew that long before the kids. So of course it is only natural to think that I am monstrous towards them too.

I spew all my irrational feelings on the internet. I must be a horrible person. Duh. Like, obviously.

You know I write those monster blog posts before the kids are awake, right? It’s not like I spend all day doing this. Ok, right now the kids are awake but there are two other fucking adults interacting with them.

Does my husband step in to protect my children from me? Well, we’ve certainly had conversations about what to tone down. He has absolutely helped me draw boundaries. I picked him because he is both willing and able to do so.

I’m sorry that me talking about the things I like about my relationship with my husband is so obnoxious.

I really shouldn’t have read that thread.

You know, if you truly think I suck… you don’t have to read it. You are allowed to have blissful ignorance that miserable bastards like me exist.

You get to have that privilege if you want it.