Therapy this morning was intense. It is rare I sob hysterically for half a session. I’m really struggling with feelings about my mom. It is fascinating how it is working this season. It’s different than previous years. I pretty much didn’t think about my mom till December 26th and it’s been a sob-fest since. It has been especially brutal during the t-break.
My shrink is very strongly urging me to back off on blogging for a bit and write some books. She believes there is more catharsis for me there than the shorter form brain dumps.
I had an acupuncture appointment today. The woman I saw was incredibly motherly, gentle and kind. She also does some form of massage (Tui Na–whatever that means; ok fine I should look it up) that she says is especially good for PTSD because it is good at working on releasing emotions as opposed to muscular pain. That sounds like a big claim. I need to research. I’m also willing to try just about anything once. She did wonders for my shoulder pain. The low back stuff is so tricky.
I have a chiropractic appointment in 2.5 hours. Then Eldest Child has a gymnastics class.
I’ve also called several contracting companies. Some are busy. Some are checking in. Some haven’t called me back yet. I have to get on it though. We have 179 days till the permit expires. I should probably call more people today…
I’m tired and sad. I don’t want to fix me. I want to lie down and never get up again.