drunk posting

So yeah. Shanna is whining and nevertheless I decided that tonight was the night to try Martinis. Thank GOD for Firefox spellcheck or I would look even more retarded. I think I have misspelled half the words so far. ha.

Dirty vodka martinis seem to be my favorite.

And I’ve confessed all kinds of snooping to Noah. I’m pretty sure he still likes me.

I haven’t been this drunk in years. It’s pretty funny. I swear that I am still within the guidelines for not harming my kid. No really. It took 2 1/2 martinis and that is not a problem per scientific studies.

shit I’m drunk. I wish I could have lots of sex tonight but this kid is inconvenient like that.

ha!!!!!

Probably not, but what the heck.

Hey parents! I know I don’t usually want advice but I’m feeling mildly anxious so I figure I’ll ask ya’ll about this. Shanna is terribly congested and I feel very bad for her. Is there much that can help her?

On the upside: since she’s been sick (post teething) she has been sleeping 10-11 hours at night and two or three naps adding up to four or five hours of sleep. Her body is obviously working hard on kicking this bug. She hasn’t slept this much in months and months.

Holy crudmonkeys Batman!

And her second tooth is through. The first one took almost a week to get fully through. The second one took maybe two days. I think it’s been only eight days total for the first two. Cool!

And I’m back to not bitching about her sleep. 7p-5:30a last night (she nursed again when I went to bed and for about three minutes at 2a), a nap from 8:30a-10a, and she’s been napping for about 40 minutes so far with no sign of waking.

Man I have an easy kid.

My brain is full.

Friends-locked cause you shouldn’t announce this shit it public.

Apparently our house has pretty significant code violations and it is very likely that we have almost no permits on anything. Oh, and the roof? Not professionally installed and almost certainly a code violation. *bang head against wall* Looks like there is a lot of stuff that needs to get fixed before we can do anything we just want to do. We have issues with our house that invalidate our home owners insurance even. Nice. We have issues with our house such that if we sold the house and did not itemize every single thing wrong with the house we could get sued years later.

FRACK!

Good lines from student papers

During one grading session we kept track of the best lines. I want to throw away the physical paper they were written on, so here they are preserved for posterity:

“It barley pierced me armor.”

“A tree is shedding it’s leaves above me like golden raindrops.”

“The warm sunrays relax me and they make me want to lay there and look at the beautiful colored sky as if I’m not going to see the sky for a long time.”

“Why he had to kill her is anybodies guess.”

“My wings are white and feathery and feel nothing like a bird’s wings.”

“All the excitement and the loss of blood would make any teenage girl nauseous.”

“My uncle is a chairman of one of the California Water Foul Association fund raisers and he knows all about the outdoors and hunting and fishing so…”

“The blackest black, like standing outside in the middle of the night and looking out in the open when there are absolutely no lights around.”

“You know the best thing to do when you want the time to just slow things down, is to watch the humans walk by.”

“Their dead bodies were conjoined by their hands.”

“Upon entering, I was greeted by dirty slums bugging for money. After fending them off and breaking the jaw of a more rowdy slum, I…”

“It’s like I just sat on a syringe loaded with some kind of venom. Well it’s not just any venom it’s a boring venom.”

“I eat the look on your face with great joy.”

“‘You know…,’ the man said as Mrs. Jones began to hide in the guest room downstairs. ‘You can run as much as you want–but you’ll run away from me.'”

“When she opened the door a young man with short brown hair, and blue/green/gray/brown eyes stood in front of her.”

Adventures in teething

No one told me that “teething” meant that each individual tooth could take a week or maybe a month to come in. No one told me that during teething she would get a terrible diaper rash, have a runny nose, and not be able to sleep consistently for a week (so far). Ok, I sorta knew those things about teething, but my kid has been so darn easy up to this point that I didn’t think it would be so bad. This is our first bout of sleep deprivation and I get the impression that we still may have it easy. Last night out of desperation we swaddled her so that she would go to sleep. It worked pretty well until about 1am and then didn’t work anymore. She has always hated swaddling, from when she was tiny so I’m surprised it worked at all. We are also going 100% diaper free for a while in efforts to help with diaper rash. Trying EC full-time is kind of scary, but we did go all night without her wetting the bed! Yay! I’m just nervous because she hasn’t pooped yet and she’s due. Missing pee doesn’t bother me much; I really don’t want poop all over the floor. ick. So I’m pottying her every 15 minutes. heh. Aunt Sarah also gave us some teething tablets; I’m not sure if they are helping or not but she is a bit happier today. Given how many things we are trying at once it’s hard to tell what is doing what.

It doesn’t help that I now have a stuffy nose and sore throat. Bodies kind of suck.

Money and family

Every time I deal with my family they ask me for money. Either to pay for something or just for actual money. In the cases of my cousins/niece/nephew asking for college money I don’t actually mind much because I think that is a worthy cause to donate towards. However I do mind in other cases. I called my sister to ask if we could take her out to dinner for her birthday. Her response was, “Oh good, cause we have a dinner planned for me and I wasn’t sure how I was going to pay for me and the kids.” *blink* So that means that a)I wasn’t invited in the first place, and b)that I get to pay for her entire family. I get that I can afford this more than them–I do. But I’m starting to really resent being treated as a walking checkbook. 🙁 My sister told me that they are planning to go to TGIFridays for my nephew’s birthday and Red Lobster for my niece’s. I kind of wonder if they told me just so that I can pay for it.

My uncle called me this morning and told me that he wants to buy a car for my niece and he was hoping that I would contribute money so they can buy her a better one. I told him that given that we just paid for my cousin’s tuition to a vocational program, we are about to hand my nephew money towards his tuition, and we have a trip to New Zealand next month–no, we can’t give them money. He then proceeded to kind of whine about how he can’t find anything within their budget but there are x, y, and z cars that are much better for only $5,000 more. I kind of saw red.

This is a lot of the reason I stopped talking to my family years ago. They’ve done this to me since I was 16. Whatever amount of money I have to live on I stretch. At this point Noah makes far more money than I ever dreamed of living on, but we also have financial goals that are fairly tight within his salary range. We can’t reach them if we support my whole family, which I don’t want to do anyway. Hell, I feel guilty asking Noah to pay for as much for my family as I do.

And don’t even get me started on my mom.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

One of the many benefits of my husband.

He’s perfectly happy to pretend that he cares about something trivial and he fakes empathy really well. This means that when I say, “I want you to express an opinion about this” he will come up with something and usually something that more or less agrees with my preferences. Well, when I’m asking about something that he doesn’t actually care about. If he cares then he doesn’t always agree with me. But I can drag him to the pattern store and tell him he gets to help me pick out a pattern and he will actually do it! Isn’t that great?! 🙂

Being present

This morning Shanna was having a hard time. She wanted to nurse. And nurse. And nurse. And nurse. Eventually I came to the conclusion she just wasn’t going to be done any hour soon and I had stuff to get done and places to go. So I pulled her off the boob and went about getting stuff done. She cried really hard and I had to struggle with my “bad mommy” feelings. After I finished doing what I needed to do I picked her up again and held her on my lap and rocked her and sang her a few songs. She continued crying for a while but it gradually tapered a bit. I told her that I understand that she’s very frustrated with me but sometimes she can’t spend the whole day on the boob. She finally calmed down and I grabbed the stuff to head out for errands and socializing. She then had a good day.

My lesson from this: it’s ok to hold her while she cries and not fix it. Even if I can fix it, maybe I won’t really be fixing what is going on in a permanent way. Sometimes there is no permanent fix. And life has to go on anyway.

Freak Breeders at the Discovery Museum

I forgot to say anything here:

Come meet other freak breeders at the Children’s Discovery Museum on Saturday January 17th. I will be arriving at 11:00 am. I will hang out outside eating a picnic lunch until 12. You can get more information about the museum at: http://www.cdm.org/index.asp?f=0

I’m not going to keep spamming my journal, instead you can come join the google group: http://groups.google.com/group/freak-breaders-in-the-bay

Come meet people! 🙂

just… happy

I was thinking earlier today. I was in a funk earlier this week and for part of last week and it was annoying, but really not so bad. I have been sad for short periods in the past few months. I get angry every so often. But I haven’t felt self-loathing in a long time. I can’t remember when I last hated myself. It’s kind of weird to think about, but I loathed myself for most of my life. I remember what it is like to think terrible thoughts about myself constantly and I’m surprised I didn’t notice it stopping. Somehow I just let it go.

That’s really awesome. 🙂 Man my life is good.

Oh, and in other news: Shanna sat up from laying down today for the first time. 🙂

Corset sale

I saw this on a mailing list:

Dear Friends,

Business in Las Vegas is devastating. Homes here are in foreclosure, all business is being affected and we need to move product to keep my manufacturing going.

Please post the blog below to every egroup and space group you can. Any effort on your part will be greatly appreciated!

Kindest Regards,

Tushell

www.BadAttitude.com

CRAZY CORSET SALE!

Due to current economic conditions we are liquidating our current in stock corsets and we’re having a CRAZY CORSET SALE! All of our hand crafted, steel boned, tight lacing, in stock corsets are on SALE FOR 20% TO 60% OFF! FIRST COME FIRST SERVE!

Don’t live in Las Vegas but have always wanted one of our corsets? If you have Paypal (we ship to confirmed addresses only) and want to buy a corset that is on sale, go to our website www.BadAttitude.com look through the stiles, let us know what style and size you are interested in (write info@BadAttitude.com) and we will send you a list of what is available and the temporary price. If you don’t have Paypal we will gladly accept a US Post Office Money Order or a Bank Cashiers Check. Once you decide which item you want we will send a money request, it’s that simple.

There may never be a better time to buy a Hand Made 3 Layer Construction Corset!

Remember shipping in the United States is always free!

Sorry no discounts on custom orders.

We hope to hear from you soon.

Team Bad Attitude

www.BadAttitude.com

Please feel free to share and repost this blog!

Batty lately

For the past couple of days I have been on a really annoying emotional roller coaster. I’m angry, sad, giddy, and annoyed by turns. In the main I am able to keep my expressions of these feelings down to saying, “Wow, I am really really annoyed right now for no good reason” replacing “annoyed” with the emotion of the moment. But I’m *feeling* really intensely and it’s bugging me. I like having more moderate emotions; they are less draining. Nothing much has happened to trigger me in any direction that I know of.

My (minor) things wrong at the moment: for some reason I have started doing all the bad habits that make my jaw hurt really suddenly. I had stopped doing all of these for a long time. A have a tooth that hurts. I’m mildly fussed about money stuff but only in a stupid vague way–we aren’t exactly in trouble. And I’m starting to read towards the comp exam again but I’m doing it very slowly and mellowly with books that sound interesting.

Yeah, those are all very very mild irks. I have no idea why I am experiencing such intense feelings. I am also starving. By golly I’m eating my weekly points and my exercise points and I still kind of want to cry with hunger. Don’t worry I am continuing to eat when I’m that hungry whether I have points or not. I don’t think it is reasonable to be that hungry and not eat. I’m trying to figure out what sorts of food will make me feel full because nothing is doing it right now. I can’t figure out why I am so hungry. Shanna hasn’t been nursing more than usual.

Shanna is in fact being her awesome, mellow self lately so I can’t blame any of this on stress from her. She’s sleeping 11-12 hours a night with one, sometimes two wake-ups. I really have no complaints about her. She’s a little clingy during the day but not beyond what is totally reasonable and normal for her age. It’s cool watching her scoot all over the floor playing with toys. 🙂

So yeah. Feeling batty just now.

F’n piece of S#!7

Every time I try to bookmark this page firefox crashes.

So here’s the god damn link: http://cupcakeblog.com/2008/04/3-vanilla-cupcakes-with-vanilla-sea-salt/

They have really amazing looking cupcake recipes.

and it crashed the last time I tried to select an icon on lj. FUCK!

Good little housewife

I like the icon. It expresses to me how deep and thoughtful most posts are.

That said: man I’ve been a good housewife today. Because I am exactly this dorky, here is my list of accomplishments…

-I figured out Quicken. It was a major pain in the ass, but I did it. I used to keep track of our budget stuff using Excel, but it took forever and I am just not willing to put in that many hours of labor anymore. Hopefully this’ll work out.
-Called home inspector for an appointment.
-Put up the craigslist ad to get rid of the table. This involved going out and taking pictures of it so I’m happy I got it done.
-Did two loads of laundry.
-Did the dishes and otherwise tidied up the kitchen.
-Finished the last touches on cleaning up the garage. It is once again able to accept the car. w00t
-Changed three dirty diapers and caught one pee. I’ve been distracted.
-Did all the necessary steps to get the property tax check in the mail. Sometimes I suck at this.
-Put up more pictures of Shanna: http://picasaweb.google.com/somethingdifferent/Shanna
-Ate lunch
-I’ve cycled the Brita pitcher 6 times refreshing my water storage in the refrigerator. This is a big deal because it means I am more likely to actually drink water in the next few days. (I only drink it cold.)
-I went and had some cookies. (I haven’t used this euphemism in a while. ha.)

Hmmmm. What should I do next? Shanna is flirting heavily and seems to be leaning towards playing with her. Maybe that’s all the day needs to be perfect. 🙂

Do you like thrift store shopping for kids stuff?

Well, you’d better do it quick: http://www.latimes.com/business/la-fi-thrift2-2009jan02,0,2083247.story

The law is very hard to understand. I’ve tried to read it:http://www.cpsc.gov/ABOUT/Cpsia/legislation.html but it’s not clearly written.

It is sounding an awful lot like all small businesses that produce *anything* for children will be in trouble if not sent out of business entirely. I can’t find a super clear explanation for how this law will be applied anywhere.

(Quick and dirty summary: all products that are sold intended for children must go through rigorous testing to ensure safety, they are mostly worried about lead. This means all toys/clothes/household items/whatever marketed for use by children. The cost of this could be anywhere from $150/item to $4000/item no one is sure.)

Everyone who has been contacting their representative has been ignored. This really sucks.

I am very seriously considering going on a buying spree for all handmade stuff I want to buy for the next many many years. If you like shopping for handmade stuff for kids you should consider it as well. 🙁

More info at: http://nationalbankruptcyday.com/