In the past four days I have lost 16 pounds. Granted, 8 of that is Shanna… but still! My Weight Watchers trained brain boggles. I’m 6 pounds above my pre-pregnancy weight. But my body sure looks different. 🙂
Whoa
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Tag Archives: body image
Optimistic?
I’m not sure if it is optimism or foolish dreams that is causing me to pack up my size 10 clothes for storage. Size 12 doesn’t seem outside the realm of reasonable expectation for me to get back to so I don’t feel bad about keeping those clothes. Size 10 though… hm. I really liked being that size. I liked how my body felt. I liked the fact that I was very fit. I liked that I didn’t get freakin rashes on my inner thighs.
As it is, I’m just leaving the size 14’s out of storage for post-baby wear. I make the assumption that it won’t be too hard to get to there. 🙂 That is the size I’ve been more than any other since hitting full grown.
Apropos of nothing.
I walked past a mirror and noticed that my neck/face look way thinner than they used to. So I measured my neck. My neck is an inch a quarter smaller around than it used to be. Wow. That’s a big difference. And I think my upper arms are a lot smaller than they used to be as well.
So after childbirth I just need to figure out how to get my thighs to decrease in size and I’ll be totally freakin set. 🙂
The thing about having a lot of free time is
I get to think about things a lot. In the past week theferrett wrote about the Open Source Boob Project. I will confess that I am not completely done with all the comments (dude–there are 1300+ of them…) but I’m a fair way into them. And I’m having a lot of thoughts about it. I think I am starting to bore Noah, so I’ll share with lj instead.
I will even cut it because it got long and I don’t want capnkjb to get mad at me. 🙂
body angst
So much of how I see myself is wrapped up in my competence. For all that I make fun of not being good at things, no really–I am fuck-you good at a lot of things.
And I can’t do them right now. And my body is awkward. And I feel stupid and lame and like I’m a big fat failure. “I know that isn’t true.” It’s how I feel. It really hurts watching people go off and do things that I am really good at and I can’t do it. Hell, it’s annoying that getting up from furniture is getting difficult sometimes. Even as I accept help I feel like I am more and more pathetic.
Tonight isn’t my best night ever.
Body image and sex and societal programming, Oh my!
Recently one of my beloved g-bloggers brought up how she is going through changes in her body image/self-image post-baby and I didn’t comment at the time because I had too many thoughts to be able to make sense of them at the time. I’ve been thinking about it a lot since then though and I think I am more able to be coherent.
(Nope, not sure I was more coherent. WAY long-winded and rambly. Ah well. If you don’t like it, don’t read it. 🙂